What you want from your senior years is uniquely your own. Amica’s online planning resources explore why it can feel hard to begin, how to talk it through as a family, and what the real cost of living well includes. At the heart of that plan is a big decision: where and how you want to live in the years ahead. For some, staying at home is exactly right. For others, it’s worth asking whether it’s still the best fit. This article shares what to think about and what to ask, whichever option you’re considering.
How to know when staying at home is working
For many seniors, home is exactly where they want to be. Amica’s Jade Willemsen says home tends to work well when:
You live close to family, and they're able to help.
You can still drive, manage your household and run errands.
When needed, you can bring in the home care you need at a cost you can manage.
You have neighbours you know, familiar routines and a neighbourhood you enjoy walking.
It may be time to reconsider when:
You’re not getting enough social connection with friends and family.
It’s harder to get out to do errands and the things you enjoy, particularly in winter.
Stairs or other barriers make the home difficult to navigate.
You’re thinking more about safety, including the risk of falls.
You cannot access the care you need or bringing care into the home costs more than a setting where it’s already in place.
“The tipping point is often when staying at home starts to limit someone’s quality of life, independence, safety, or ability to continue enjoying the things that are important to them,” Jade says.
Can your plan support your future needs?
Amica’s Kellie Besseling and Sandy Holliday suggest that no matter which support option you choose, you ask yourself: “What happens if my needs change?” Sandy adds that it helps to look ahead at the support you might need, especially with a medical condition, even if you're independent today.
If staying at home is the plan, build in support
Staying home doesn’t have to mean managing alone. A call to your local health authority or provincial home care program usually starts with an assessment. An occupational therapist can walk through your home and suggest changes, such as railings or grab bars. If you’re considering a private agency, ask whether the same person comes each time, who covers when a caregiver can’t make it, and whether all the costs are clearly documented. Family caregivers can take breaks through respite care, adult day programs or short stays.
If you are looking at support outside the home
Whether you’re considering moving in with family, a publicly-funded care home or a seniors residence, ask the same thing of each: can this meet my needs now, and if they change? If you’re considering living with family, talk openly about who will help and how you’ll adapt if care needs grow. For public-funded care homes, ask whether the location is close to home, what care is provided, and how long the process may take. If you’re touring private-pay seniors residences, Jade suggests asking what care can't be provided, because you want to ensure the residence can care for you if your needs change. Could they support a mechanical lift or dementia care? Katarina George says culture is harder to see in one visit, so look at any option at different times of day and notice whether caregivers know the names of the people they’re caring for. Her question suits any setting: how will you help me keep living the life I want to live?
When one partner is also the caregiver
Whichever option you choose, ask two questions together: can we stay together, and is one of us carrying too much? Katarina, who works with many couples, often hears the caregiver say, “I don't know how much longer I can do this on my own.” Her message is that asking for help doesn’t mean giving something up. With the right support, a couple can spend less time managing care and more time being together.
Make room for what matters most
Conversations about the future tend to focus on what we might give up. Kellie asks the other half of the question: what can I look forward to? Maybe it’s more time with friends, less worry about stairs or safety, or more energy for the things you enjoy. Jade encourages people to picture their best life, then find a way to make it happen, at home or in a residence.
What’s next?
Explore the resources in Amica’s planning centre, including our Residence Tour and Evaluation Guide and more blogs from this series.