Conversations with loved ones about moving to a senior-living residence can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re navigating complex feelings, concerns, and preconceived ideas about care options.
Helping a loved one through this transition may lead to guilt or fear about initiating the conversation. At the same time, the senior may worry about losing independence and control.
So, remember to approach the conversation about senior-living options with empathy. Be prepared, and make it a collaborative process, which supports quality of life and peace of mind.
Is your loved one ready to talk about senior living?
Before discussing senior-living options with a parent, consider if it’s the right time to make a transition.
Sometimes, a capable spouse, relative or in-home caregiver can help manage safety issues, but for those with health, mobility, or memory issues, that support may not go far enough.
It can help to recognize clear signals. For example, determine if your loved one is…
- physically and mentally safe in their environment
- capable of living independently and managing daily tasks such as finances, meals, and medications
- feeling lonely or isolated (social interaction is crucial to cognitive fitness)
- confused or wandering (potential warning signs for seniors with age-related memory decline)
“Evaluate if the parent can go about daily life without harm or injury,” says Dr. Heather Palmer, a cognitive well-being specialist who’s worked with Amica. “At a residence, we take care of everyday chores so the time you spend with your parent is happy and enjoyable.”
Palmer adds: “It’s time to explore moving and dropping the idea into conversations when you know there’s a diagnosis or a likelihood that the person is in decline. Too many people wait until they’re in crisis before moving.”
Understanding care options in senior living
Once you know it’s time for the talk, research care options, such as Independent Living, Assisted Living, and Memory Care. This research can guide conversations.
When is the right moment to discuss senior living?
Start this sensitive conversation in a calm and unhurried environment with open dialogue. Emphasize the importance of your loved one’s well-being, and consider their needs and wishes so the decision is collaborative, whether they’re experiencing cognitive decline or not.
“Having your parent cognitively involved in the process is always going to be better,” says Dr. Palmer. “It will increase the likelihood they’ll have the cognitive resources to learn about their new environment and adapt to it.”
You may encounter resistance, and that’s normal. Now is the time to actively listen and respond with empathy — give your parent the space to express their feelings and fears.
Expect several discussions before a decision is made, but keep ongoing dialogue, being mindful of the emotional impact.
Research senior living with your loved one
After you’ve had conversations, invite your parent to tour senior-living communities, and engage in discussions with facility operators and residents. Give them a deeper understanding of what it’s like to live in a retirement residence.
Highlight the benefits of residences, such as discerning care, life-enrichment activities, and culinary options.
Share stories and testimonials from residents at preferred residences, including blogs and social-media content highlighting experiences from seniors who wish they made the move earlier.
What’s next: moving to a senior-living residence
Once a decision has been made, create a timeline-driven action plan. Consider booking movers, use a residence suite/townhome floor plan to guide your packing list, fill out change-of-address forms, manage prescriptions, and more.
During this time, use Amica’s Moving Checklist and keep open communications with your parent. Ongoing conversations can be challenging, but it's important to emphasize the goal of safety, comfort and the well-being of your loved one.
Guide the transition with compassion and dignity, using this as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your parent or loved one.
Ready to consider making a move? Book a visit to an Amica residence in your neighbourhood today.